The Middle 510 miles AKA Day Two

What's the best way to start day two of one of the biggest adventures of your life?  You guessed it, a waffle. Especially when you make it yourself. Oh, there also has to be  sausage  and an english muffin.  Really, I don't think there is any other choice.

 Except for my Mother, who had dry wheat toast.

 I had my slurry.

 It was all good.

(I told my mother that I would tell my husband that she did put butter on her toast. Consider him told, Mom)

We got on the road at 9:00am.  Our first stop 9:45.  Now in all honesty, between my liquid intake and my father's prostate, stopping every 45 minutes is about right.

Somewhere, before our fist stop, there was a sign that said Bowling Green x number of miles. Dad busts out with the proclamation "we are almost through Kentucky."  Now, I'm not a geography genious. Sometimes I have trouble making my way across town but we were only about 30 minutes from the hotel, which was on the south side of Louisville.  My guess is we had a few more hours of Kentucky left to go.

Stop two happened at 10:12.  There was a small crisis in that the gas gauge dipped below half.  Yes, we had to stop. We also needed to find a walgreens. Mom had a root canal the day before they left and there seems to be some magic over the counter pain medicine, non-aspirin, that only Walgreen's carries. Just my luck, we found a CVS and I had to deliver the news.

As I came out of the gas station, after buying $8 worth of snacks (all good choices and will last a few days, by the way) "Dad, there's a CVS four lights down, across from the Best Buy."

"Ok, Kath. Lorraine," he yells over the top of the car. We were all outside within ear shot of each other. "There's a CVS down the road. Let's go."

"No, Raymond. I said Walgreens." Now, I can't convey tone too well. There are cetain ways people stretch out words to inflect tone. Those two sentances were full of tone.

We all pile back in the car and off we go....down the road to CVS. Dad's thought, and rightly so, is that CVS and Walgreens are usually across the street from each other.  Unfortunately, not in this case.  She found something that she "hopes will work."

 Me too, Mom. Me too.

We crossed into Tennesse at 11:10 am.   The second proclamation was that at noon, when we hit Nashville, we will eat lunch.  The first restaurant we see we will stop, as long as it's a good one. At this point, I'm thinking I made a tactical mistake.  I should have gone into CVS and picked up a bottle of Nyquil or better yet, some Benadryl tablets I could have crushed into a fine powder. You know, for a little nappy nappy after lunch which is when my driving shift began.

Lunch was McDonald's, sorry no Cracker barrel today.

I was lucky enough to be driving when we hit Atlanta at 5:00 p.m.  It was as fun as it sounds (Stephaine, it wasn't the same and was kind of strange not driving with you on 285).

As we sat in traffic Dad and I discussed Kudzu. If you don't know what Kudzu is go here. Anyway, we were discussing how it's invasive and Dad hatched a plan. "They just need to dig up the root.  Get some of those prisoners out here and have them dig up the roots." I love my Dad's plans, I really do. I have some research to do tonight to report back to him tomorrow. I have found out that you don't need to kill the root, just the root crown.  This is going to change the whole plan.  I might have to print out my research for him to read in the car tomorrow.

I feel obligated to report that the reason you aren't hearing much about Mom is because she's in the back seat.  The boat, better known as a Grand Marque, is large and loaded down.  She can't hear us up front. After awhile, yelling conversations isn't that enjoyable.  She did get two phone calls while we were stuck in traffic.  By the time she woke up,  found her phone, found her glasses and put in her ear phone she had missed the first call. It was one of my brothers. She called him back.  About 10 minutes later my other brother called her.  I got a glimpse into how conversations are repeated. I'm sure I've been on the other end of the phone while she tells the same story for the third or fourth time. Then again, she may not realize it.  On this trip alone I have heard the same story three times how Aunt Florence had to get new hearing aids because one of the Sisters at the convent got tired of her just saying "uh huh, yes" all the time to everything.

The beginning of our day two.

It was after lunch when I realized I was in real trouble.  As we were driving on a long stretch of 24 East the following words popped out of my mouth. "Oh look. See Rock City, 4 miles."  All I can say is the sign made me do it.

Oh, and gas was $2.48 "over here".

7:12 p.m.  All tucked in safe and sound in Byron, GA

The First 304.45 Miles AKA Day One

The first thing I want to say is that I love my parents. They are hard working people who did their best to raise, shelter, feed and educate four children.  Were they perfect? No, but who is? I think they did above average.  Keep all this in mind as you read this and subsequent posts.

At the young age of 78, my parents decided to pick up their lives and move from outside Chicago to outside Orlando.  God Bless and more power to 'em.  None of us kids believed it would ever really happen. After all they have been talking about it for a few years now and if I hadn't just been stuck in the car with them for the last 3 1/2 hours driving from Indy to Louisville, I probably still woudn't believe it.

Thats right. I'm helping them drive to their new life in the land of oranges, snakes and hurricanes. Wait. Did I mention the part about no snow? Yeah, there's that.  I might be jealous about that part but, you know, who's to say.

I missed the first four hours.  Probably the hardest part of the trip.  I've moved enough in my lifetime to know that first step, when you know you are turning away for good, can be rough. For my Mom it's taken a toll.  She will get past it. It's just that it's hard at first.

By the time they got to me they were ok, just tired and maybe a bit cranky.  I kept smiling and loaded my stuff into the cramped car.

I kissed my husband goodbye,  shut the car door and mouthed HELP ME before backing out the driveway.

And so it began...

"Dad, where's the GPS?"

"You don't need the GPS, Kathleen. I know where we are going."

"It's under the front seat." This from my mother who is wedged in the back seat with a vaccuum cleaner and 3 ft lilly plant among other things.

"She doesn't need the GPS. I know how to get there.  65 to 12."

With a little foresight on my part I had put their new address into the GPS on my phone.  So,  I fired it up.  Yep, you guessed it.

"Dad, did you mean 65 south to 24?" I asked as I read the directions on my phone.

"Yeah, that's it.  Hey Lorraine, remember that time we came here and I missed that one road and had to go out to Lebannon? What road was that? 32?" By this time we were at the Kroger getting gas which is basically across the street from my subdivision because the gas tank can not get below half.

So, my phone GPS is talking and then the conversation shifts. "My next phone is going to do that." Sometimes just have to hang on and go with the flow.

"Do what Dad?"

"Talk to me. I want one of those phones that talk."

"Yep,  that is exactly what you need." I pulled out of the gas station and we were on our way.

My parents have this habit of reading the signs on the side of the road. I know you're thinking, yeah so? I do the same thing. Well, they read them outload. Sometimes they get them right and sometimes they get them wrong. I learned a long time ago to not correct them.  Say for instance when they insist they saw a sign that said Public Library in a place you KNOW there is no library.   After an hour of debate on the existance of said Library you might, say, have to drive them by the place again just to prove it wasn't a library. The sign did say Public on it but it was not a library.

As we cruised down to 465 and across to 65 South they talked about the last few weeks and some of the things they went through getting ready to move. I talked about work, Mark  and the dog.  We talked some of politics and the scenery. Mom told some stories of all the people she said goodbye to and all the addresses she had to write to once they are settled. Then I'd find out gas was 2.69 "down here" because there was a big sign telling us so. It was a nice chat.

Along about 5:10 pm Dad decides we need to stop at 5:30 to eat.  We were just about to the Outlet Mall on 65. I said I had to pee so we'd be pulling over sooner then Dad saw the Crackerbarrel sign. Oh yeah, we were stopping.

"Yeah, let's go eat......find a hotel."

WHAT?!? We've been in the car less than 90 minutes. On their behalf, they had been driving since 9 a.m.

Suddenly noise from the backseat "Raymond, no."

I chimed in. "Dad, no way. We'll eat and get to Louisville."

He was tired but he caved. "Ok. Ok. I like Crackerbarrel. They have what I like."

Perfect!

Earlier in the day I had mentioned to my husband that I know they were tired so I hope they sleep while I'm driving. Like having kids. You love them and all but sometimes it's just easier when they are quiet. You know what I'm saying.

I was hopeful as I sat watching them both down a carb laden dinner. I knew it wouldn't take much. Turns out it didn't.  But the best line..and there were lots...the BEST line of the night came at dinner.

From my Dad. "Kath, did you want your own room or did you want to share with me and Mom."

The very first thought that went through my head, and I DID NOT SAY IT (I swear), I can thank
a friend of mine from work for putting in my head.  "Ohhhh, fuck no."

Thank god my filter was working. "No Dad, I'll get my own room."

That one earned a text home with something about selling my liver if need be.

After dinner they both dozed on and off  it was quiet until we hit Louisville. They perked up then.

"Oh look, we are going to cross the Ohio river. There's no breeze."

I had to ask. For this one I was too curious.  "Dad, there's no breeze on the Ohio river? How does that work?"

"Oh no. That flag over there isn't moving. There's no breeze."

There's also no library on ST RD 32 by the post office, but hey, maybe the signs will tell us something different.



8:30 pm and all tucked in safe and sound just south of Lousivlle.

Two rooms, thank you very much.